Hey, when you look in the mirror does it seem like sometimes your head is way too big or some times it's way too small, but it's definitely never the right size in proportion to your body? Or is that just me? Because for me it happens all the time.

It would be too easy to let this diary slip into oblivion again after a week of not writing, although I have an excuse for that since my sis was in town and we were being on vacation, but now I've got (at least) a week to catch up on. We had a good time while Angie and Brent were here. Hung around Portland, went up to Seattle for a couple of days and turned the tourist vibe on full, taking the Ride the Ducks tour (a tour of the city and a boatride in Lake Union in a WWII amphibious vehicle) and a tour of the Seattle underground where you can see the old city that has the new city built on top of it. Interesting stuff, and a good time. It's funny, I live in Portland all the time, yet I never seem to get out and do things like go to Powell's or wander around downtown unless I've got people here. I bought a book at Powell's, a book I've wanted for a long time, and I could have gone to get it a long time ago. Strange. We drank beer in the afternoon and walked around the city, I at the best pastrami sandwich I've ever had at Ringlers Annex. Saturday night Jenn and I went to the Eels concert, which was great, although we missed one of the encores. They played one after the lights came up and we were already out the door, goddamnit. Those sneaky Eels. And the whole way to the show and for hours before and the whole ride home I just wanted to cry because I was sad Angie was leaving already and it felt like I'd hardly spent any time with her.

I'm tired of my job, sort of, in a way. Yes, I'm definitely tired of it, but it's the easiest way for me to make decent money without working too hard. I'm just tired of it though, I don't like seeing the city this way. I don't want to drive all over town all the time. And I really would like to have a lot more money. While Angie was here we threw caution to the wind and just blew money and credit all over town (not crazy like, just not worrying about buying a beer or a meal here and there, which I would normally not do otherwise because I'm strangely cheap) and it felt fucking GREAT! I would like to not worry about whether spending four dollars is a bad idea, and really I guess most of the time I don't have to worry about that, but I still do because, like I said, I'm strangely cheap. Every strange thing I see, every weird job like driving the amphibious tour vehicles around Seattle, I think, "Maybe that's the kind of job I need." I have a hard time just enjoying stuff because I'm always thinking about whether I could do that stuff for a living. I could probably ramble about this for days. Like going to Saturday Market, I'm not just enjoying the stuff that I see there, i'm thinking about what could I do that I could sell at Saturday Market? Constant conversation with myself in my head. Even when you're talking to me I'm usually somewhere else. Just hanging out with myself. I'm weird. I'll write more later.